Whatever Works!

This afternoon I decided that after choir practice that I would take the 3 girls out to eat by myself...famous last words. Let me explain, I've never been afraid to take my kids out in public. Even when Eden had started to get more and more difficult; it was never something I had a problem with. Most of the time, I take Ed or someone else with me to help. Every time I have taken the girls out by-myself, it's been some sort of disaster.

Eden had been home all day today, so I know she has a "clean slate". Usually if we are out all day, she will be a lot more difficult. We went to choir and then the restaurant. My mindset as we were driving to the restaurant was to get in order and eat and get out. I even went so far as to asking the older girls to think about what we are going to order so we didn't have to take so long.

We sat down in the booth, I sat down next to Eden. She was very happy because she was getting macaroni and cheese. We ordered our food and waited patiently. While we waited, Eden was somewhat patient. I tried to play with her and I also had brought her blanket in so she would have something to hold if she needed it. She ate her dinner without a fuss. Everyone ate well and behaved very well.

Eden finished supper and we were waiting for the waitress to order dessert, while waiting Eden got a little antsy. I could see that this could possibly be a problem because the girls still wanted their dessert and there was no Ed to take her out to the car (which is what we usually do). I had an idea. I looked under the table (which she has been known to hide in other occasions) there was no food or anything there. I know it is dirty, but we aren't afraid of dirt in my house. I was just looking for a dark quiet place to get her back from being overstimulated. I then told her to play under the table for a minute. It took her 2 minutes under there in the dark and she came up right before dessert came out and was wonderful for the rest of the meal. We ended up leaving and we had the best time ever.

Being aware of why Eden acts the way she does is such a blessing. I am so much more aware of her surroundings, and her cues. When she is uncomfortable, instead of acting out because I don't let it get that far. I either pick her up or take her out of the room and she is fine. We spend a few minutes together and then we can go back to what we were doing. When I need her to follow me I ask her, then hold out my hand. I don't grab her had anymore. We have had so many wonderful times out together now that we understand more about what is going on. We have just made some little changes and it has helped so much.